Sunday, 16 November 2014

DAY 14: #30Layers30Days // LOVE LANGUAGE

                             What are your favorite ways to give and receive love?
3 things  = Touch. Intimacy. Giving. = Words
I only started getting comfortable with this last year. I use to think something was wrong with me, I would literally jump out of my skin if someone brushed against me. Side hugs are the most I could give or allow from anyone, raised in a Muslim environment, hugging women is not encouraged at all. However, I find it very reassuring when people hold my hands and slowly I have learnt to hug and stay firm. Anyway with my church, there is no boundaries, everyone is big on pulling and hugging so tight your guts are spilling out. *Laughs* I have become such a hugger myself and I totally love it, especially when I get the shoulder rub down and lingering hugs over my neck…..I was still talking about church here!!

Urgh when the subject of intimacy comes up, very sure the automatic pop-up is sex. But ain't taking about that here, intimacy for me is open honest conversation, getting to know one another, while it is easy to give up your body, opening your heart, soul to someone else is the real challenge of intimacy. Because it brings it own raw vulnerability that actually more dangerous, in the sense that  you can have sex with someone you don't like, kiss someone you would never sex in a millions years with no sense of intimacy. But for me, it is an out of world experience because whoever I am sending time with  knows what keeps me up at night, believes in my light, and understands the logistics of what, why and how….with what we have to put up with nowadays, intimacy is in the danger of been misinterpreted as too lame for men and more for women who are confusing it with the notion of love itself. An example, you meet a guy and you get talking spending so much time together unravelling and revealing, it becomes easy to confuse that adrenaline  rush as love and start to convince yourself you found the one perhaps.  Personally, it is a strength ever since I identified my version of intimacy, I have never lured myself into a false sense of security when hanging out with guys, drinks will be drowned, conversations will spark, I might shamelessly giggle & laugh , but that all it was, an intimate evening that I will remember for time to come in my treasure of memories. 


Self explanatory. 

Best of all, plain words are enough! My girlfriends don't understand how much tears they cause every week when they speak into my life. When Debbie says "Kennie are you okay"  and Mary hugs me out of no where asking  'have you had a good week'? Sophie is the most random, her text are always on time!!! Ola tirelessly calls, text, suggest etc and gives me the naughty eye for not doing something. Have I ever mentioned how Beautiful Beloved BelievedIn I am?


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