Day 7 of the most challenging month so far in this year, praying and believing for someone I love with all of me and I almost gave up on such a simple task. It is so easy to say to a friend or people that “I am praying for you” or “you are in my prayers” but when I set out on a journey to be purposeful to the person that hurt me so badly that I have been left emotionally fragile, it is hard!!!!!!. It was easy to pray for him when we were together, but almost a year on, it is completely different. I have experienced highs & lows, climbed mountains & walked valleys, run in circles on my emotions with a deep sinking feeling that I cannot pull off. It has been a total mess and the only message I can send through is prayers.
Luke 6:28 “pray for those who hurt you” I didn’t understand this message and what Jesus wanted me to feel when he threw this scripture my way until this weekend. In just praying and placing my prayers in writing everyday whether I felt like it or not has been astounding because this peace & calmness is washing over me and I have had over three people advice me without consultation.
I look up to God and knew it must be the prayers, how can someone else know what resides deep in my heart or what am struggling with if not for God’s spirit, because I haven’t spoken to anyone else about this challenge. There is power & healing in this humble obedience, because I started with asking for strength on day one, day two I said to God "before I started that this is hard and I don’t know why I have to do this". Day 3 I was like yeah “I wish you God’s love, it is not me that loves you, but God”. Day 4 & 5 I don’t know where the prayer sprigged out from at all. By Day 6, I finally had the guts and didn’t know when I had gone over 3 pages of prayer just pouring out God’s love led by the spirit and it like every minute, my prayer point is growing and growing and my heart is getting lighter. So thank you Jehovah Rapha, Healer God for doing what you say you will do.
Beautiful Beloved, Believed In.